Send in The Clowns

My dad's C has worsened. He is malnourished because he wouldn't eat. And this sudden turn of events have affected my mom very much. She has not been sleeping well because she is worried about my father. She checks up on him every now and then to see if he is alright and comfortable. And when she is able to get some sleep, my dad would sometimes also wake her up because he needs assistance. Be it for food, for medicine, to be comforted, etc. My mom is now my dad's rock. But this rock is not a strong rock. My mom is not a very healthy woman herself. She has hypertension and all these lack of sleep and stressful situations may trigger an attack. It is my duty now to make sure that I give enough support to my mom so that her stress levels will not elevate more than necessary.

While I can suppress sadness and all other "unnecessary" feelings, my mom can't. She's been crying on a daily basis now whenever we talk about my dad. She cries because she's tired. She cries because she is scared. Sometimes I want to cry, too, but for her sake I have to look like I am strong. I even indulge her talk about showbiz stuff (esp. Sarah G. and Marian R.) just so she can rest her mind from thinking about my dad's condition.

I just wish my dad gets better so that we can smile again.